See the Sun Again
by Battus philenor
Summary: GS - With a little help, Grissom tries to be happy again.
1. Default Chapter

Title: See the Sun Again

Author: Battus philenor

Disclaimer: I own nothing CSI related.

A/N: This story was born out of an obsession with the Dido song See the Sun. If you are unfamiliar with it, go to my site (link on my main ffnet page) and go to Favorite Poems. While this concept has been done to death, I couldn't help myself. I wrote this story about 6 months ago, but was not happy with it. After sharing it with ShipperGirl a couple of months ago, she convinced me to do some work on it. So after adding a ton, I'm happier. Thanks ShipperGirl! It is complete, but I will be posting in sections. It's easier to proof first that way and quite honestly, the size is scary for me. A huge thanks goes out to Ghibli for her fine beta work and encouragement. I'll shut up now...

It was about five minutes before shift was to start, and Grissom was uncharacteristically nowhere to be seen yet. Sara was immediately worried given the fact that he was always at least an hour early.

Nick and Warrick were animatedly arguing across the table as to who was better at some inane video game when she caught sight of Catherine flying down the hallway towards them in the break room.

Between the look on her face and the speed with which she was traveling, mild worry turned to high anxiety. The coffee she'd been sipping on was pushed aside, suddenly not sure she would be able to keep it down.

The various scenarios that played through Sara's consciousness were quite numerous considering how quickly Catherine was moving, but everything from broken toe on the edge of the tub all the way up to horrendous car wreck ending with Grissom's funeral flashed through her head.

Breezing in with papers clenched tightly in her hands rustling, they announced her presence to the guys. Haggard and a little pale, all eyes were glued to her, the apparent bearer of bad tidings.

"Grissom's not coming in tonight," Catherine breathed out anxiously as she sat down at the head of the table. All recognized the significance in her taking Grissom's chair, his place of authority, one of the few he really had.

"I just came from Ecklie's office and Grissom won't be in for a few days. Apparently his mother passed away unexpectedly last night. So we're on our own, and for appearances sake anyway, I'm in charge."

She tried to sound nonchalant regarding her sudden shift into a supervisory role, but it didn't quite work. Even though temporary it gave her a moment to shine, to impress those who would be watching, perhaps for consideration for a future position.

All present around the table knew Catherine better than to believe she wasn't thrilled at the prospect of being in charge. They also knew that she was hurt by the fact that Grissom didn't tell her what was happening himself. So, nobody said a word about the little gleam that appeared in her eye.

Catherine's hurt made Sara feel better somehow though. She realized she was being petty, but she and Grissom had started to rekindle their fragile friendship after months of... what? Not friendship. Tension... and not a good tension. So even though Grissom hadn't called _her_, she felt better knowing that he didn't tell anybody else either, especially Catherine.

"Catherine, are there any details regarding the funeral yet?" Figuring that the services would take place in California, Sara hoped that the earlier she knew what was planned; the more likely the chances of her attending would be.

"I don't know, Sara. Gil didn't call me, and you know Ecklie wouldn't think to ask." She tried to act angry, but the sadness in her voice betrayed her hurt. "Knowing our fearless leader, he won't call to offer any info either. Okay, we have work to do, so let's get to it."

The next afternoon Sara did some research online, looking through the obituaries of a couple of local papers where Grissom's mother lived. Finding it, hidden between two long articles recapping the lives of two of the area's finest elderly citizens, she began to read.

The others were shrines really in comparison to the understated and simple offering for one Olivia Grissom. Reading through the small column of facts, she realized she was finding out more from the sparse footnote of this woman's life than she'd ever learned from Grissom.

Olivia Grissom had owned and ran a modest art gallery in town for most of her adult life. She'd also held various fund raisers to benefit the deaf community, one she was very active in since the loss of her hearing decades ago.

Pieces of conversation over the previous few years were suddenly falling into place for Sara. Little tidbits of information were suddenly huge admissions given this new context. His unending knowledge of art, while quite unusual for a scientist, now made sense; along with his more than general appreciation for the deaf, and his flawless signing skills.

Sara knew something else was trying to break through; there was another connection screaming to be made, but she let it go, content for now with this glimpse into the man, through his mother.

Armed with the day and time of the funeral, she was able to find a return flight; in and out the same day, leaving her to arrive just an hour late at work. She would get no sleep between shifts, but it wasn't as if she'd never done that before.

Two days later, she wore black on the plane, so she wouldn't need to waste time changing. Running late, Sara headed straight to the service. Most of the seats were taken so she decided to just sit in the back.

She could see him sitting alone, with no one in the few surrounding seats. His face was pale; making him look washed out. Coupled with the lightness of his graying hair and beard he looked more empty and desolate than she'd ever seen him. A part of him had gone when his mother went, of that Sara was certain.

Directly in front of him was the dark mahogany casket with its brass accents and billowy crème colored interior. All that could be seen from her seat were a few wisps of white hair and part of a woman's profile, carefully laid against the billowy pillow inside.

She stayed until the end, watching person after person passing their condolences along to Grissom and an older gentleman. Waiting until the place was empty save those two, she approached warily, uncertain to how he'd react.

His head was still hanging, slumped forward as if fascinated by his shoes, only looking up when she spoke.

"Grissom, I'm so sorry." Never removing her eyes from his she couldn't even be sure if he recognized her.

"Uh, thank you Sara." Captivated by his shoes again, his hand reached up to his eyes in a wiping motion. A lump formed in her throat immediately, as tears threatened to fall not for the first time for her that day.

The older man spoke then, in a voice so similar to Grissom's that Sara found herself staring at him, wondering how closely related they were.

"Sara, not the one from Las Vegas?"

Surprised that someone knew her she choked down the lump in her throat before answering.

"Yes, I'm uh, Sara, Sara Sidle from Las Vegas. I just flew out this morning."

"Well that was a lovely thing to do dear. Olivia would have been pleased. I'm William Livingston, Olivia's brother. Gil's uncle as it were." Reaching an arm up he gently patted the back of the broken man who stood with them.

"Will you be coming back to the house then Sara? We have some things out, you know, food things normally set out for these occasions." Removing his large hand from Grissom's back he brought it up sweeping a white curl back into place. Sara realized rather quickly which side of the family Grissom had gotten his lovely curls from.

"No, no I really need to catch a plane back; I just wanted to stop by for Gris— for Gil." Watching her face redden William let a smile creep over his wrinkled face.

"Still makes everybody call him by his last name does he?"

"Excuse me?"

"He's done that since he was a boy. The darnedest thing..."

"Oh well, I took a class, a seminar really, and it just kind of stuck." Looking at William, Sara realized she needn't have answered; he was lost in a memory. Eyes lifted up off to the left, glistening slightly.

The awkward silence prompted her to once again concentrate her attention on Grissom.

"Grissom, I have to be going now." He looked up at the sound of his name again, this time with a little more recognition in his eyes. "If you need anything, _anything_ Grissom, please let me know." Leaning in she gave him a brief if not awkward hug. Pulling back from him she noticed the faintest of smiles on his lips.

"Thank you for coming, Sara. For... thinking of me. And I'll let you know if I need anything." Seeing disbelief in her eyes he added a hasty, "I promise."

She wanted to hold him; help him start to get through this awful pain. She knew it would be too much for him right now though. She still didn't think he realized she'd actually flown out there.

"Okay, I have to be going, William it was nice meeting you. Grissom, I'll see you in a couple of days?"

"Yeah, in a couple of days."

Turning she walked out of the funeral home, wishing she could stay and take care of him.

TBC

Battus philenor


	2. Chapter 2

It had been 5 days since the funeral and Grissom still hadn't called anybody or come back in to work. Not that it would be out of the ordinary for somebody who just lost a parent, but this was Grissom. He lived and breathed work, and if he needed to not think about something, that's where he'd be.

Sara thought about him incessantly, hoping he was alright. She picked up the phone to call him at various times throughout the day, but could never seem to make herself dial his number. On the sixth day she couldn't take it any longer. She had to go check on him and make sure he was okay.

She knocked at his door but got no response. Knocking again, she put her ear to the door, listening, straining to hear anything. Nothing. His SUV was outside, so she was quite certain he was inside. Unsure of what to do, she tried the doorknob. It wasn't locked and that made her a little apprehensive.

Adrenaline started pumping as the hairs on the back of her neck bristled and a tingling sensation could be felt in her fingertips. Entering his house, she quickly and quietly scanned the confines for any clues.

Everything appeared to be fine. Nothing was knocked over; there was no apparent sign of a struggle. She tried calling his name, but once again there was no answer, no sound at all.

Figuring that since she was already in his house, she might as well do a thorough walk-through to make sure he wasn't lying unconscious somewhere. She headed down the hall to what she could only assume to be the bedroom.

The knot in her stomach grew with each step she took. The door was slightly ajar and she quietly pushed it all the way open with one hand. Looking around cautiously, she spotted his form on the bed.

She couldn't help but gasp at seeing him. She really hadn't expected him to be there since he didn't respond when she'd called his name, and if he'd heard her gasp he didn't acknowledge that either.

He was lying fully clothed on his stomach at an angle across the bed. Creeping closer to make sure that he was breathing, a silent prayer was offered up when she saw he seemed to be just sleeping.

It was then she saw his suit which he was wearing at the funeral, lying in a heap on the floor. The sudden tightness in her chest was her heart breaking for him, as she realized he'd been wearing his current clothes for days.

She had to help him through this whether he wanted her to or not. Standing by and watching him crumble like this was simply not an option.

Sitting on the bed next to him she tried to figure out how to proceed. The eye that was visible flicked open and immediately focused on her. This instantaneous response followed by a lack of reaction sent a current of concern down her spine. He didn't say a word, just laid there looking at her, a one-eyed shell of a man, lying prone on the bed.

She placed a cautious hand on his face, as much for her comfort as for his. His beard was as soft as she imagined, but was so out of control that it no longer resembled the sexy facial accent she had dreamed of so many times.

"Grissom..." She had no idea how to begin. "Are you okay? Are you sick?"

He just slowly shook his head no, and didn't utter a word.

"Okay. No to what Griss? I'm not trying to annoy you here, but I am worried about you, and I need to make sure you're okay."

Again no verbal response, just him moving his head and a single blink of the eyes. She could see his eye start to tear up a bit. Still not sure what was going on, she was at least comforted by the fact that there was some emotion there.

"Grissom, I can see that you don't want to speak. That's fine but I'm not leaving you here, so I'm going to ask you some yes or no questions. Just nod alright?"

She watched the tear that was forming in his eye and for a moment it teetered on the rim of his lid. It was finally large enough to spill over and wet the bedspread which was pressed up against his face. That did it. That was the one act that completely shattered her heart. "Oh Grissom, I'm so sorry. It's okay."

Lying down behind him she encased him in her arms while continuing to whisper supportive words in his ear. His left hand snuck out from underneath his stomach to grab onto her arm, and give it a squeeze. She could feel him start to shake and knew that the tears were flowing stronger now. No noise could be heard other than his ragged breathing through the onslaught of tears.

She held him like that for what seemed like forever. Him crying, her comforting, and neither wanting to move once the storm had passed. She hated to disturb him, but her worry was still so strong.

"Grissom, do you think you can talk now?"

"Yeah, thanks."

"You don't have to thank me. I was worried about you. I still am."

"I'm... I'll be okay."

"Grissom, have you been eating?" He just shrugged his shoulders. "Okay, well I'm taking that as a no. I'm going to see if I can whip you up something. You have to eat."

"Okay. Thanks Sara."

"Don't mention it. Now, don't take this the wrong way, but you need to go shower..._now_." She tried to lighten the demand with a smile and a pat on his leg, and it looked like he appreciated that.

"Yeah, I just... I couldn't seem to make myself get up."

"It's alright Grissom. I'm here now. We'll get through it, together." She wasn't sure why she said it that way, and neither was he, but they shared another shy smile, and she went out into the kitchen. Her smile returned when she heard the shower down the hall.

They sat in the living room in silence. Grissom looked better after his shower and small meal, but this wasn't something that was going to go away with some freshly scented soap and a full stomach. Sara got up suddenly and held her hand out to him.

"Come on, we're going out."

Grissom looked up at her. His face still bore the tired and ravaged look of a man who'd been to hell and back. "Sara, I don't know. I haven't gotten out of bed in days, I'm not sure I have the energy for it. Or want to."

"I know, but the fresh air will do you good. Come on, it's just a little walk, I want to check out that lake behind this town house of yours."

She threw a wink at him. She knew he was mentally drained and she could probably talk him into anything right now. It was a plan she meant to use to force him back among the living.

He got up slowly shaking his head at her. "I'm surprised you didn't stick your bottom lip out and stomp around the floor." He grinned at her.

"Well, that was going to be my next move, if the wink hadn't worked."

He looked a little shocked until he saw the big smile spread across her face. It was the smile he liked to think she reserved just for him. He couldn't help himself, it warmed his heart.

They walked around the small man-made lake mostly in silence. Close enough to brush up against each other occasionally, but neither seemed to notice. There was no tension like there had been in the past. For once, there was nothing sexual in their movements. He was hurting, and she was there as a friend. Both were more than content with that.

On their third lap around the lake she could see his mood start to change. There was too much silence and he was becoming sullen again.

She grabbed his hand in hers, watching his face to make sure she didn't cross some invisible boundary of his. He just glanced at her and gave her a brief grin.

"What are you thinking about Grissom?"

She could tell he was fighting tears again. He took a minute to blink them back before speaking.

"Hmm. My mother."

"Good memories?" She squeezed his hand as if to remind him that she was right there with him.

"I was thinking about all she had to endure. All of the heartache of going deaf, my father leaving us, raising me alone, and being alone for all those years after he left. Having me as her son, and not having any grandchildren. Dying alone."

She didn't reply right away. She gave him some time to think about those awful things. She figured he had to, that he needed to think about them, but she wasn't about to let him dwell on the negative for too long.

"Grissom, you need to think about the good things too. All of the good memories. Going deaf wasn't a curse for your Mother. You told me that she was a strong woman. I'm sure she would have handled that part of her life as a new challenge, and not let it limit her. As far as your father leaving... do you think she wanted him to stick around just because some people thought it would be the _right_ thing to do? She was better off without him."

"I know you're right. It just... she's gone and it hurts." His face reddened at this admission and for the third time that day, she ached for him. This man who had invested so much time and energy into covering up his emotional side now seemed to have no choice but to open up. She was thankful that she was the one he was opening up to, but it was still hard to see him so anguished.

"Now, as for the rest for your negative thoughts, I never met your Mother, and you don't speak of her too often. From what you have said though, I know she adored you, that she thought of you as a blessing. Would she have wanted grandchildren? Of course she would have. Every mother does; it's in their genes. But not at your expense. She didn't want you to just be a sperm donor, Grissom."

Sara continued on though both of them had a slight blush gracing their faces. "She wanted them because she wanted you to be happy. She wanted you to love and be loved. If you didn't find somebody to make you happy yet, then I'm sure she didn't want you to settle for less than what you deserved. She wanted you to have it all."

"Yeah."

"You need to remember the good things too Grissom. You need to remember her as a strong woman who loved life and loved you."

She stopped to let him chew on that for a while. They finished another lap around the lake before he spoke again.

"Thank you, Sara, for being here. Thank you." He pulled her into a brief hug. And again there was nothing sexual about it. It was a warm embrace given, and taken, in friendship. Both of them felt better.

Sara stopped by every day after work to check on him. To talk about how their respective cases were going, how William was fairing settling the rest of Olivia's affairs all alone in California. Small things which had set them on a path of healing, for both of them.

They even made plans for a full day of movies and popcorn on Grissom's couch for later in the week. A day which they both found themselves looking forward to.

TBC

Battus philenor


	3. Chapter 3

With one movie down and the first batch of popcorn gone, they slipped into a casual conversation which was reminiscent of those they used to have before he had asked her to come to Vegas. Sitting close on his couch, leaning into one another, neither had a thought that went beyond friendship.

Having started with small inane chatter, Grissom realized he felt the need to share more with Sara, the person who was quickly becoming his best friend.

"You know, my Mother had Otosclerosis." With the admission shared, he looked to her, comforted when her only response was to snuggle closer into him.

"It's a degenerative hearing disorder. That's what happened to her hearing so many years ago. It can also be hereditary." Glancing again to gauge her reaction, he paused watching her become lost in thought.

Sara's mind flashed back to the obituary. That was the thing she couldn't put her finger on. She had known there was something else, something right there for her to discover. All the times he'd ask her to repeat herself, or would stare at her lips while she spoke, it was all becoming so clear.

Then another realization hit her. He didn't do those things any more. He had taken several consecutive days off for the first time she'd known him.

"You had treatment." She said it matter of factly; it wasn't posed as a question or said with any rancor, it just was.

Somewhat surprised she'd put everything together so quickly, he answered her simply.

"Yes. I had surgery."

"I'm sorry, Grissom. I wish I'd have known, I would have been there for you."

"I know. I guess that's one of the reasons I didn't tell you."

Blank faced and blinking, she let his words sink in for a minute. "I don't understand."

"Sara, I knew you would have been there, with me, no matter what. I felt weak enough, already so inadequate; I would have viewed any comfort or assistance as that given out of pity. I couldn't handle that."

She watched him look away from her, hanging his head, seeing his hands fidgeting in his lap. Squeezing his shoulder she tried to comfort him without judging. She was surprised when he continued speaking.

"I was scared, Sara. There was a real possibility that the surgery wouldn't work. I was scared I would lose my job; the thing that defines me, has defined me for too many years now. And I was afraid I would lose you, your friendship and others over it."

She knew how much courage that admission had taken for a man like Grissom. She was sad that he'd gone through that alone, but relieved that he could at least tell her about it now.

"I understand, Grissom. Just know that you can tell me anything. I won't judge you or pity you, and I'll always respect you, both as an investigator and as a man. I'm your friend, and I'll respect your wishes and your privacy." With one final squeeze to his arm, they sat, letting the silence wash over them, cleansing them of those memories and any lingering doubts about their admissions.

A few more weeks passed, each with the same routine of daily talks and a weekly daylong movie and popcorn fest. And both were growing quite comfortable with their renewed friendship.

Neither having an innate ability to share or give up parts of themselves, their communication skills and knowledge of each other was growing exponentially. Movie day was always the day when larger admissions were made.

While standing in his kitchen, making popcorn together Grissom wondered briefly what Sara thought of his relationship with Lady Heather.

"Sara, can I ask you a question?"

"Of course you can, shoot."

"There were... rumors about me and Lady Heather?" He watched her hand freeze in the middle of sliding the pan over the burner on the stove where she was melting butter.

"Yes..." An uneasiness crept up into Sara's stomach. Sharing was great, but there were certain things she thought were better left unsaid.

"I find it interesting that people will jump to conclusions about a friendship, without even bothering to ask those involved first." He watched her still, trying to see if she had bought into those rumors too.

"Well, you know Grissom, sometimes even when the information is shared by one of the people involved, it isn't believed anyway."

As she finally looked at him, he knew she was no longer talking about his relationship, but hers with that paramedic. Guilt washed over him, for not believing her.

"You're right. I guess sometimes all the reassuring in the world won't compensate for our insecurities."

A silence passed over them and they continued with their popcorn making tasks. They sat on the couch in their usual spots with the snack between them.

"I enjoyed her company."

Sara jumped at the sound of his voice. Unsure of exactly what he meant by company, she just waited, hoping he would continue.

"She was interesting. She had a fresh perspective on things. She didn't judge; she was very perceptive and accepting of everything. I think that's rare."

"I think you underestimate some of us, Grissom."

"Perhaps. But people did expect there was more to that relationship than there really was."

Breathing a silent sigh of relief she realized she was just as guilty as Grissom was. She'd assumed there was more to that relationship, just as he had about her and Hank.

"People assumed that Hank and I were closer than we were too."

"But you dated him, Sara." He wasn't sure he wanted to know the answer, but he had a need to know what she meant by close.

"Just because I went out with him a few times doesn't mean that I ever felt anything more than friendship for him. We had an ease, we could talk about everyday things, but I never felt anything deeper for him."

"I guess we both made assumptions. I'm sorry, Sara. I should have known better." A grin came over his face and he added, "I just didn't like him very much."

A sound that might almost be classified as a laugh escaped from her. "Me either."

"I'm sorry for how he treated you, Sara. You deserve better than that."

"Yeah. I'm sorry I assumed about you and Lady Heather too."

An easy silence fell about them again before Grissom finally reached for the remote and started their movie. He was relieved that the time they shared was not strained; there was no tension or need to progress more quickly. The leisurely pace at which their relationship was rolling was easy and greatly appreciated.

Sara wondered how they thought they ever knew each other at all considering how much they had recently learned about each other. Thankful for their time together, she was pleased to have the opportunity to get to really know Grissom.

A few weeks later at work, Sara was paired with Nick. In the garage; combing through an old Chevy Nova, hoping to find evidence that this particular vehicle had transported their victim.

"Yes. Got a long brown hair in the back seat, Nick."

"I'll see your hair and raise you some blood on the floor board."

"Really? How much?"

"Not sure yet, I only found a small drop. We'll spray it up and see if somebody tried to clean up a larger area." Reaching for the luminol, Nick couldn't help notice the old excitement so evidently back in his coworker, the sparkle that had found its way back into her eyes.

"How are you doing, Sara?"

"Good Nick, I've got three long brown hairs from this seat now. He didn't clean the side edge good enough." Flashing him her widest grin, she showed him the tweezers with the 3rd hair dangling from their grip.

"Good, but I meant how are you doing? You seem happier lately. Things are going well huh?"

"Oh. Yeah, I guess Nick." Immediately feeling uncomfortable, she tried to turn the conversation back to the job.

"Uh, you ready to light it up yet?"

"Almost. Anyway, I just... I'm glad that's all. Things are much better lately all the way around. Not as much tension at work you know? It was a good thing you did for Grissom." He knew he was treading on unsteady ground. This could go either way, and he was hoping her mood was such that she would take the compliment without a fuss.

"No big deal Nick."

"Okay. Well, you both seem much happier, that's all. Now hand me that light will you?"

Thankful to get back to the task at hand, Sara passed the light and prayed for the lovely fluorescent glow. She was not disappointed when the whole floor board lit up before their eyes.

"Sweet! Grab a sample of that and I'll run it down to Greg, Nick."

Thankful to be out of her discussion with Nick, she dropped the samples off with Greg and decided now was as good a time as any for dinner. Veering into the break room Sara headed directly to the refrigerator without even noticing Catherine's presence at all.

"Hey, Sara."

Jumping slightly the embarrassed brunette turned sheepishly to her older coworker. "Hey Cath, I guess my mind was on food, I didn't even see you there."

"On food huh? How are things going?"

"Good, you know. Same old, same old."

"How's Gil doing?" Leery of the gleam that had entered Catherine's eye, she decided to try to nip this in the bud immediately.

"I don't know, why don't you ask him?" Turning back to the fridge Sara mentally patted herself on the back. Her response hadn't been too snippy or mean.

"You know, we all think it's great that you're helping him through this difficult time, Lord knows he needs somebody, we just don't want it to be too much for you."

A flash of anger coursed through Sara's body suddenly, livid at the implications of the word we.

"What the heck! We Catherine? We who?"

"You know, just me and the guys, Warrick and Nick."

"I'm fine Catherine, and as far as I know so is Grissom. I'd appreciate it if you all didn't discuss me, him, or us behind our backs."

"Sara, don't get mad. We weren't discussing you really. We just noticed the change around here. The environment is much more pleasant since you two have started... hanging out, mending your fences."

"It's still not right Catherine, talking about people behind their backs."

"Okay. Point taken and you're right. But, Sara, how you two interact does affect all of us whether you like it or not, and we care about you, both of you. I just want you to know that you've done a wonderful job. Grissom's like a whole new man. Hell, you're a whole new person too."

"Who's a new person?" Came the deep voice from the doorway as Warrick strolled into the break room.

"Apparently I am." A smirk graced Sara's slightly less irritated face as she grabbed a paper towel from the counter.

"Ah yeah, you and Gris both. Nice Sara, that was a sweet thing to do."

"Yeah, don't spread it around." With that Sara left the break room; part of her wanting to tell her coworkers to mind their own business, and part of her intrigued that they thought her and Grissom had changed so much.

Back in front of the microscope, comparing the hairs she'd found in the Nova to those of their victim, she let her mind wander. It was true that she and Grissom's friendship had grown as they spent every free moment together. Sara also realized that she still loved Grissom, that she would always love him, but she also knew that she didn't want to push him.

If it was going to happen at all, she wanted this to happen at his pace. She absolutely wanted a physical relationship with the man, but she was so happy just spending time with him.

Lost in thought while comparing hairs, she never heard Grissom approach. A smile crossed his face as he watched her for a moment, completely engrossed in her task.

Making himself move before anybody could witness his transgression, he advanced a little less stealthily trying to warn her of his presence. A startled Sara Sidle was not something he wanted to contend with.

Having seen her nearly rip off Nick's head previously for making her jump with fright, Grissom knew better than to ever sneak up on her.

"Who's coming up behind me?"

"Ah, the bearer of a classic movie for after work, if you're interested that is."

Turning around Sara graced him with her widest of smiles; making him thankful he'd been born.

"A classic huh? I'm always interested in a classic. What have you got?"

"Goldfinger." Cringing a little he waited on her response; hoping that James Bond would be acceptable to Sara.

To say that he'd grown accustomed to her company while watching movies lately would be an understatement. In all honesty, he didn't think he ever wanted to watch a movie alone again.

Between the stimulating conversations they would get into while watching the movies; often resulting in extended pausing of the movie, and the fact that she often sat quite close to him on the couch, watching alone would be devastating.

He was almost certain he could go to the store and pick out the exact brand of shampoo, soap, and toothpaste that she used now. Having memorized every detail of her scent made the whole movie watching experience a wonderful treat.

"I don't know that most people would classify Bond movies as classics, and Pussy Galore, Grissom? Of all the Bond movies, that's the one you pick, huh?"

Even though she was smirking at him he couldn't help the blush that had taken over his face.

"Well, she's a very talented... pilot."

"Relax, you're so lucky that I have a thing for Sean Connery."

With a brilliant grin and a small blush of her own she turned back to her microscope.

"Sean Connery huh? Isn't he a little old for you?"

"Nah, I have a thing for older men."

And with that she got up to disappear down the hall, leaving him with his mouth hanging open. He hoped she'd just given him a clue, but he didn't want to rush anything with her.

They had been enjoying a closer friendship for some time now, and even though he wanted more, he didn't want to jeopardize what they had right now.

TBC

Battus philenor


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Since I haven't thanked her in the previous two chapters, I would like to thank Ghibli again now for her wonderful beta services. You are the best! Of course any remaining erros are mine. Thanks for reading.

Three days later he had worked up the nerve to ask her to breakfast at the diner. While they had eaten there on occasion after work, they had never done so alone; giving it the feel of a semi-date.

While not a full blown dinner and a movie, it still was alone time together, away from work and out of either of their houses.

Having ordered coffee, he was becoming nervous that she wasn't coming. Sara was never late, and he wasn't sure whether to be more concerned that perhaps she doubted his intentions in asking her or that something may have happened to prevent her from coming.

As he mentally debated which scenario was more likely, he spotted her breezing into the diner.

"Sorry, Grissom. I knew I had some time before you'd be done with your paperwork, so I thought I could catch a swim. I lost track of time."

She plopped into her seat reaching for the sugar for her regular coffee.

"No problem, I'm just glad you're okay. You're never late, for anything."

"Yeah, well swimming relaxes me and before I knew it, my arms were tired. That's when I realized I'd been in too long."

"It relaxes you huh?" A sheepish look crept over his face as he leaned in almost conspiratorially and whispered, "I can't swim."

"Yeah right Grissom."

Sitting back with an almost hurt look on his face, he just stared at her.

Watching his reaction, she realized he was telling the truth.

"Grissom, you grew up by the water right?"

He simply nodded.

"How can you not swim? You can do anything."

Truly perplexed by his admission she neglected to see the ridiculousness in her statement.

"Sara, I can hardly do _anything_. And quite frankly I'm not sure if I should be flattered or disturbed that you think so."

Realizing a little late that she sounded like a schoolgirl, her face flushed as she tried to move past her idiocy.

"Grissom, how can you not know how to swim? You used to hang out at the beach as a kid."

"I was merely looking for specimens Sara; I never went into the water."

"But, didn't you want to swim?"

"Sure I did, but I was always alone. I figured it wouldn't be safe without somebody with me. If anything happened, nobody would know."

Saddened by his admission, Sara struggled not to feel sorry for the now adult man before her. It proved to be more difficult than she had hoped, as she couldn't shake the image of him as a lonely child.

"It's rather embarrassing, so I would appreciate it if you didn't spread that around."

"I would never say anything."

Silence enveloped them as neither knew what to say after that.

"I have an embarrassing story."

"Quid pro quo?"

A smile claimed her face as she continued.

"Yes, I was in 7th grade health class. You know those cross sectional views of the body?" Seeing him nod she carried on.

"Well, we had a test on sex education, and I got a B. All through high school, that's the only time I ever got a B. Anyway, I aced the test except for the damn sectional view of the woman. They chop the leg off and show you a side view. I still can't look at those pictures and make any sense of them."

"Sara, you're a scientist."

"I know Grissom, I told you it was embarrassing, but..."

"But what? There's more?"

Letting out a big sigh she nearly moaned, "Grissom, I cannot believe I am about to tell you this. I tried my best to hide my B from my Mother, but she found it in my pants pocket when she did the laundry."

"Don't tell me she was upset because you got a B?"

"No. You don't really know my parents. She made me... look, you have to understand that my parents are kind of... different. They're sort of into some odd things."

Not certain he wanted to hear the explanation he coaxed her anyway. "Sara, what did she do?"

"Promise me you will never tell anybody."

"Sara."

"We had a..." Leaning in close, but trying not to look in his eyes she whispered, "we had a 'becoming one with your vagina' lesson."

Seeing the pure mortification on her face, he tried not to laugh. Bringing his hand up he attempted to cover the smirk that was uncontrollably forming, but it was too late. She snaked her arm out and smacked him on his hand.

"Grissom, it is so not funny. I tried to explain to her that I knew the material, but she just kept referring to that damn cross sectional drawing, and telling me I needed to know myself."

Knowing exactly how awful that must have been for her, he reached out, taking her hand in his, giving her a reassuring squeeze.

"Your secret's safe with me, Sara." The look between them lasted longer than either expected, and both blushed again as he finally let go of her hand and they enjoyed the rest of their breakfast.

Two nights later they were eating dinner together at her place, again. They had fallen into a routine and were both quite comfortable. No talk, small talk, or in-depth conversations; it didn't matter. Both were content to be in the company of the other.

It happened to be a night in which no talking occurred. Even though there was no verbal communication, plenty was being said between them. Flirtatious looks were exchanged which neither were backing down from anymore. Seemingly accidental touches that neither pulled away from. She could sense his eyes roaming over her form when she wasn't looking. The sexual energy around them was driving her crazy.

The dishes were done in complete silence, standing so near that there was never an instance when their bodies were not touching. They retired to the living room with coffee and were sitting quite close together on the couch. The cups sat untouched on the coffee table in front of them.

They both started to speak at the same time and they shared a grin. At that point they both knew that there was no need for words. They were both about to say the same thing, and they were both thinking the same thing.

Grissom held out a shaky hand to her. Sara laid hers on his and allowed their fingers to intertwine. They both let out a breath that neither knew they were holding; which made them both grin again.

Suddenly holding hands was not enough. They both leaned in for a hug. Sara's hands were immediately drawn to his short curls as Grissom's hands gravitated to the small of her back. They both breathed in the scent of the other.

"Oh God." escaped Sara's mouth.

"I know. You feel wonderful." Grissom pulled her closer to him.

Sara snuggled in as close as their positions would allow. "Oh, it's not enough Griss. I want more. I need more of you."

Grissom pulled back slightly to look in her eyes. He could see love in them. He could also see lust, and he knew he needed more too.

He leaned toward Sara again and they kissed for the first time. Even though he had wanted to take this slowly, he found he wasn't able to help himself. She was intoxicating.

The kiss deepened as their tongues started dancing slowly while hands roamed leisurely over each other. His fingers were fumbling around with the buttons on her shirt, and her fingers were unable to stay away from his curls. He finally got her shirt off only to be impeded by her bra. He thanked the gods that he was able to unhook it on the first try. Throwing her bra to the floor, his hands were immediately occupied with teasing her nipples.

Too caught up in his curls and mouth, Sara realized when she felt cool air on her chest that she was way behind in undressing Grissom. She went to work on his shirt and had a much easier time than he did in removing the garment. She ran her hands up his chest flicking his nipples and feeling pleased with herself when he moaned in response. She wanted to ask him if they could go into her bedroom, but she didn't think either of them would make it in time.

They pulled back a little to look into each other's eyes. Without words, they both stood and completed the task of undressing.

Grissom had an overwhelming desire to watch her face the first time they were together. He wanted to look into her eyes as he entered her, as he thrust into her, as he made her come, and as her orgasm washed over her.

He took the one step needed to be in her arms again and for the first time their bodies were naked and touching from head to toe. Grissom sat down on the couch and pulled Sara on top of him. She straddled him as they faced each other, their lips quickly reuniting. Grissom's left hand reached down to Sara's center feeling that she was more than ready for him.

He smiled as he realized he made her that way. With his thumb Grissom drew circles around her now drenched nub, teasingly trying to avoid the erect tissue.

With her right hand Sara reached down and grabbed him gently. Stroking him a few times as she brought him towards her opening; she leaned forward slightly in order to slowly lower herself on him. They both exhaled deeply as he filled her completely.

Their bodies stilled as they stared into each other's eyes. Not wanting to hurt her, Grissom waited for her to move first. She started slowly, but soon almost ten years of tension and frustration took over for both of them and she was grinding on him with abandon, and he was driving into her with equal force.

Suddenly Sara cried out his name as her body started to tremble and Grissom silently thanked the gods again because he couldn't hold on any longer. Thrusting into her one last time he released everything into her depths. Sara slumped into Grissom and they collapsed sideways onto the couch. Neither wanting to let go of the other, they laid there until sleep took them.

Grissom woke up first with a smile on his face. He had yet to open his eyes, but he felt as if he were in a cocoon of Sara. He could smell her, he could feel her, and he could even still taste her on his lips. He knew without question that this was how he always wanted to wake up. They were still on the couch, spooning. He pulled her closer to him still.

Sara stirred and was immediately reminded of where she was by something hard poking her in the back. A smile crept over her face as she thought of Grissom's erection waking her up, and how she wanted to wake like this every day.

End

Battus philenor


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